Whoever said that the person who you loves you the most will never make you cry is either a liar or found a man who is so close to perfect it makes you want to puke.

My guess is that at some point, that guy got pretty tired of the Mr. Perfect act and one day all of the pent up emotions came flowing out in some fashion. I would venture to say that it was not pretty.

I have shed more tears in my truly amazing relationship than I have in the course of my whole life to this point. Does that mean there is something wrong that this guy is making me cry? Not at all. In fact, I think that it’s the complete opposite. I think it is an amazing gift to have someone care enough to dig through the mess that I am sometimes to make me better.

 Has he hurt me? Yes. Have I hurt him? Absolutely. Have we shared our past hurts with one another and cried on behalf of the other? Of course. Has he had to tell me the hard things about myself that I would not recognize without him bringing them to light? Yup.

We are simply two sinners living in a sinful, fallen world giving our best and failing often. Thankful for grace.

Isn’t the point of the most intimate earthly relationship to change and grow and be refined? All of those things require a recognition of failure and identification of areas that need to be uprooted and removed for good. None of those things come without emotion and it’s not easy to change ourselves and long-entrenched habits.

I used to pride myself on not being very emotional. It took something very deeply personal to make me cry. What I have learned is that no one can ignore emotions. They are real and they need to be felt and examined as they lead us to the core of ourselves and the things that need removal and the things we need to work through.

Feeling emotions of all kinds also allows us to feel with greater intensity what others are feeling and much greater joy. You can’t truly appreciate and experience the high times in life without having gone through and know what it means to be in the deep low times.

If I have someone in my life willing to stick around through all my life-changing, gut-wrenching, ugly emotions to get to the high and beautiful points, I should be very grateful.

So, to the man who rubs my back and tells me he loves me as I sob even after I have hurt him, thank you. That seems very simple and inadequate, but you have made me feel deeper than I have ever felt before. I love you for that.

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